SUMMER conversation and sight

Bonjour ,
I am.
Alive.
In some metaphorical way.
I have been out of town for 10 days. 10days, out in the nature, without a bed , without them folks. Without my melodramatic music playlist, without the couch and my big black boots.
I've been stirring in the air of smoke and anxiety, unknown vibes swirling like semen out there in the woods. Feelings Ive pushed away or haven't even felt before gushed over my chest with sinew.
sinew.
I had no sinew, no power source. Nada.
I had to re-convince myself to live, to rebuild myself and to exhale for a while.

This is when I got my new perspective, Ive started to notice everything, every little twitch, every little change or consistency of setting. Its amazing what you catch when you start seeing. its like I came to the real world again, its not "like", you stupid half american boy, it is just that. A sign on the truck,  expressions,  body language, the skin of a newborn, her name, her name.

Ive met a friend who met a friend whom she had a conversation with, while conditioning he spoke and didnt listen. He talked chauvinism and she clutched her teeth with disgust. He was self concentrated and immature, no wonder his mind cant process the thought of caring, listening and putting an effort into getting the sexual experience he craved in a smart and respectful way. Id never talk about a girl like she's my game and im the 'I-have-to-go-with-dirty-details-to-ma-pips-about-the-size-of-your-breasts' hunter. Never , I promised her. And summer clanged to her hair.